Looking Back to Move Forward - Part I

Appropriately for this entry, a "selfie" - with a very uncooperative & uninterested doggie. He's my baby joey.

This is a story that's going to take some time to tell.

This is a story that I tried to run from for 21 years but stares me in the face everyday.

This is a story that's hard to tell.

Enveloped in this story are lessons of love, peace, hate, anger, tragedy, forgiveness, laughter, inspiration, survival, denial, acceptance, hope and so much more.

This is the story of my survival of a near fatal Motor Vehicle Accident that happened exactly 21 yrs ago this month.

As I recall this story, you'll see how I was a typical, self-concious, 16 yr. old. Like most 16 yr. olds, I was ready to experience the world and spread my wings of curiosity and independence. I had dreams to fulfill and a plan in place. I had fond memories of my birthplace, New Zealand, from when my Mum took me there to visit when I was 12yrs. old and I wanted to go back. Looking back, I was obviously discovering myself and trying to understand fully who I was. I was surrounded by a mostly Caucasian world in London, Ontario Canada, that taught me nothing about my Polynesian roots and I innately felt that I needed to connect with more people like me to understand myself better.

So, I was planning on completing my 11th year in high school and spend a year in New Zealand with my family. They were open to having me come and I was determined to get there. Through the kind support and recommendations by a couple of dear church friends, I landed my first "you get to use your social insurance number" job at Mc Donalds. Before that, it was babysitting and early morning paper routes (back in the day when teenagers were still allowed to deliver newspapers and when newspaper subscriptions were a booming business to inform the public of daily news!).

I loved my job at Mc Donalds. I learned quickly and had no problems satisfying the needs of HANGRY customers with their special order burgers (before this job, I had NO idea you could even order a burger with no pickle, onions or ketchup. A PLAIN burger? It just didn't sound right to me but as I tell my kids, "different strokes for different folks!")

I took as many extra shifts as I could - much to the delight of my managers. I would've done it without them paying for my Mc Donalds dinner too but there are very few Polynesians that will turn down a free fast food meal and I wasn't about to be the first. A paycheck smelled like a one-way ticket to New Zealand. I was on my way!!

You know how they say one decision can change your entire life? Through my story, you'll see just how true that is. You'll also see how other people's decisions can change your entire life as well.

To be con't...

(hang in there with me! It's a heavy burden I carry and it will need to be told in pieces. It feels like a huge load lightened to even think of facing it again and releasing it. Thanks for reading and sharing this with me.)